We’ve all heard the word “kink” used in describing sexuality, as well as the term “fetish” related to sexuality. What are the difference between the two or are they one and the same?Kink, as it turns out is more related to non-traditional forms of sexuality that are used to enhance the arousal state between two partners. Kink is used as an accelerant and/or amplifier for sexual arousal through these methods that aren’t so conventional.One of course has to define “conventional” and its meaning. Being such a subjective term, it can be defined a zillion different ways. What is natural for one may be completely unnatural for another. This makes defining “kinky” acts a bit difficult to define, though this isn’t the important concept. The important concept behind is that with kinkiness, we are adding something to the sexual act that is shared by two partners. It adds to their sexual experience, together.A “fetish” is different. Apparently, fetishes are sexually arousing for their ability to replace the partner through another form of sexual stimulus. For instance, a man who is turned on by women’s shoes. The shoe becomes his “partner” and main focus of sexual intimacy (through fantasy thoughts or even physical contact — such as through masturbating with her shoes). The woman whose shoes he is getting aroused with (and by), is typically not present. Even if she was, she would be secondary to his primary focal point: her shoes.I imagine “fetish” would also extend to an individual who may be obsessive about certain body parts, and use these as the main source of arousal, even if these body parts are on another person. This would give us a fetishistic scenario that includes a partner. So, for example, if the aforementioned man had a foot fetish, then his main focus (with his partner) would be her feet and not her. She, as an individual, would take a backseat to her own feet.As masturbation is usually employed when one is alone, this would make it more of a fetishistic act (no partner, as with “kink”). Unless, of course, one was a narcissist. The narcissist (one who is in love with themselves) would sort of supply their own doppelganger during the process of masturbating. So what does that make a narcissistic autofellationist? Or what about a person with multiple personalities? (Jeez, all this sexuality stuff gets confusing.)Masturbation would then seem to be an excellent way for people to live out their “fetishes” in a truly fetishistic manner. After all, it’s a fetishistic act employing a fetish as a stimulant and focus. That seems rather obvious but it’s really a neat concept. It’s a way to live out and satisfy one’s sexual fantasies for themselves and by themselves. However, as we are all aware, when the fetish becomes too deeply embedded in one’s sexual card catalog of turn-ons, it can become too much of a dominant and controlling force. Then the individual has difficulty getting sexually aroused by any other method and this can impair their personal lives and relationships.I think we all need love, intimacy, kink, and comfort, with a dash of fetish sprinkled here and there.Exploring unconventional methods of sexuality; methods that our ancestors enjoyed and impassioned themselves with, is one of my interests. Those men who are interested in autofellatio should read Yogafellatio. It is a book that helps guide men in this intense form of sexuality.